A Bert and Ernie Singalong

thanks to Brian Fennell (fenn@wpi.WPI.EDU)

Ernie					Bert
*****					****

   					[Watery sounds]
      					Yanky Doodle went to town
   					a-riding on his pony...

   					Ahhh, I love taking my bath, peace and
   					quiet, all alone.
[knock-knock-knock knock-knock]
[Knock-Knock-Knock-Knock]		...and called it macaroni
   					Oh! two, three....
Hi buddy Bert
					Oh, hi Ernie, oh hey will you close 
					the door, Ernie there's a draft.
oh just a second Bert.
					Ern... Ernie what are you do...? 
					You can't push the piano through the 
					bathroom door.  
why, sure I can, Bert, watch...
[Grunt, bump, grunt, tinkle, KA-bump] 	Aahhgh!
..see 					
					Ernie?
*Klech-ksh-crsh-sh-sh*
					Wh-WHAT are you doing with
      					a piano in the bathroom!?
Oh Bert!  I heard you singing in
the tubby there 			Yeh?
and so I thought I 
would just come and sing along
					I don't WANT you to sing-along,
But...					I want you to get out.
...but everybody sounds better 
singing in the bathroom Bert.  
You know...				I don't want the piano in here Ernie.
...well Sure, Bert, what's a 
sing-along without a piano?
[starts to play piano]			It's ME, that's what it is...  Alone!
listen to that Bert 			Stop that playing.
doesn't that sound nice		        Stop it right now.
doesn't that make you just want
to sing-along.				...makes me want to see you
					out of here.
No, Bert, listen:
[sings]
Gee, Bert				what?
It's so much fun			no, it's not
I know you'll like it 			...I won't like it.
once you've begun			...I won't begin!

					Ernie I have to scrub my toes
					I've got to wash my hair.

We, Bert				what?
could have a ball			no way!
if I could get you 			*simmer*
to sing at all
[ends song but plays for Bert]		NO!...
					[sings]
					I refuse to sing-along.
					I won't.
but, Bert...
    					So please don't ask me if I want to
					'cause I don't.
Pretty Please...?
					Although for you I would do 
					almost anything,
Really?
					along is one way which I
					do not want to sing.
But, listen...
[Sings]
ol' bud-dy...
It will make you Happy 
when you start to sing a Snappy
little number that will 
bounce you right along.
					no...
Like "Farmer in the Dell" or 
"Old MacDonald had a Farm" or 
maybe "What's the Name of that Song".
					No!
So if you use alot of voice 
you'll love it that you've got a voice
and even if the notes you sing are wrong
					Ernie!
you'll do a favor for us 
if you lift your voice in chorus
for a swinging sing-along song.


E:            It     will  make  you   Hap   -  py 
B:            I            re   -      fuse     

E: when  you  start  to    sing  a     snap  -  py	
B: to         sing    -    a    -      long.  

E: lit - tle  num  - ber   that  will  bounce  you 
B: I          won't!

E: right  a - long			
B:                         so          please    

E:       like "Far - mer   in    the   Dell"   or
B: don't      ask          me          if

E: "Old  Mac - Don - ald   had   a     Farm"   or
B: I           want        to          'cause      

E: may - be   "What's-the-Name-of-that-Song"
B: I           don't

E:                                             So    
B: al	-      though      for          you 

E: if    you   use   a  -  lot   of     voice  you'll 
B: I           would       do           al  - 

E: love  it    that you've got   a      voice  and
B: most        an    -     y     -      thing

E: ev  - en    if    the   notes you    sing   are  
B:

E: wrong
B:                          a     -    long

E:      you'll do    a      fa -  vor  for    us     
B: is          one          way        which 

E: if   you    lift  your   voice in   chor  - us
B: I           do           not        want

E: for  a      swing-ing    sing-along song
B: to          sing


					ErnIE!

please, Bert				what?
you'll like it too			no, I won't!
we'll sing Together 			ahhhgh
just me and you
					No!  I refuse to sing-along 
					that's it.
					And in the bathtub? it's ridiculous!
    					I Quit!

					That's that.
					That's that!
Gee, Bert, that was wonderful.