What a Friend We Have in Cheeses

What a friend we have in cheeses,
Mozzarella, Cheddar, Swiss!
Bleu and Limberger's sweet breezes
Lingering like a lover's kiss.
     Humble milk's apotheosis,
     Muenster, Provolone, Brie
     Damn cholesterol's thrombosis
     Cheese is Gouda stuff by me!

Heed the U. S. Dairy Council,
Keep the Gruyere on the shelf.
Even just a tiny ounce'll
Give you vitamin B-12.
     Gather, pilgrims at the deli
     Buying Edam and Havarti,
     Wedges moist and cold and smelly,
     Bring home lots and have a party!
@parody @food
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